Gavin Newsom (@gavinnewsom) telling the story of why he decided to offer civil marriage to gay couples in San Francisco came up in Insta today. I hope that most people know by now that the first lesbians married in San Francisco were Del Martin and Phyllis Lyon, founders of the Daughters of Bilitis and publishers of The Ladder.
Thank you for sharing this! I have so much to learn. How will I ever fit it all in my wide head? I have so many thoughts about it and I don't even know where to begin.
I feel like the original intended audience of The Ladder was for isolated, non-political lesbians like me.
Do you think The Ladder becoming more feminist has a similar trajectory of lesbian communes that dissolve because of factional splits?
It seems to be more of a generational shift. Like I said, younger women needed the Ladder, but didn’t know about it, and didn’t know they needed the wisdom of older lesbians. When I came out in SF in the 80s, I would never have wanted to speak to an older lesbian, the “butches and femmes” were just embarrassing and scary. We knew everything there was to know about what a lesbian life could be.
You read my mind. I was going to ask if your generation of lesbians found the older generation of lesbians to be cringe (as the kids say).
When I was in my twenties, I thought older lesbians were the bees knees. My admiration for the older generation has dwindled over the years. I'm not sure why or if it's good or bad or a normal part of growing up (realizing your heroes are human).
I admired all the generations before me, but especially the Gen X Quiet Existing - women a few years older than me who were forging the path I wanted to walk on. Coming out was so hard for me, anyone who had a similar experience automatically gained my admiration and respect and gratitude. And now maybe that initial high has worn off.
Gavin Newsom (@gavinnewsom) telling the story of why he decided to offer civil marriage to gay couples in San Francisco came up in Insta today. I hope that most people know by now that the first lesbians married in San Francisco were Del Martin and Phyllis Lyon, founders of the Daughters of Bilitis and publishers of The Ladder.
Thank you for sharing this! I have so much to learn. How will I ever fit it all in my wide head? I have so many thoughts about it and I don't even know where to begin.
I feel like the original intended audience of The Ladder was for isolated, non-political lesbians like me.
Do you think The Ladder becoming more feminist has a similar trajectory of lesbian communes that dissolve because of factional splits?
It seems to be more of a generational shift. Like I said, younger women needed the Ladder, but didn’t know about it, and didn’t know they needed the wisdom of older lesbians. When I came out in SF in the 80s, I would never have wanted to speak to an older lesbian, the “butches and femmes” were just embarrassing and scary. We knew everything there was to know about what a lesbian life could be.
You read my mind. I was going to ask if your generation of lesbians found the older generation of lesbians to be cringe (as the kids say).
When I was in my twenties, I thought older lesbians were the bees knees. My admiration for the older generation has dwindled over the years. I'm not sure why or if it's good or bad or a normal part of growing up (realizing your heroes are human).
Yes, the emotion I remember feeling is cringe.
Why do you think you admired older lesbians then? Which generations? This is where the rubrics from your article come in handy.
I admired all the generations before me, but especially the Gen X Quiet Existing - women a few years older than me who were forging the path I wanted to walk on. Coming out was so hard for me, anyone who had a similar experience automatically gained my admiration and respect and gratitude. And now maybe that initial high has worn off.